How to cope with a loss of a parent?

Whether it be from a sudden incident or from a long term illness, it is not easy to lose a parent. One can never prepare for this change in life situation. One however can find means to cope. I found myself in this position when I lost my mother just two months ago to stroke and complications. The Covid lock down did not help make things easier as health care professionals were stretched to their limits with caring for all kinds of patients. Now I find myself grieving the loss my best friend and center. Those who have lost pass through several stages of grief. There is no right or wrong way. And the process is not linear or forward moving all the time. Knowing where you are in the process can help you manage your emotions and lead to healthy cathartic release. Known as the Kubler Ross Model, the first stage of grieving is denial. This is the first emotional response. At this stage family members believe there is some sort of mistake. There is disbelief. The second stage is anger. I notice this most often happens in males. Family members who are angry and grieving target other family members and use them as outlet for their anger. They blame, find fault or grievance. The third stage is bargaining. This means family members bargain with God or the universe that they will reform in exchange for something. The fourth stage is depression. The family member in depression refuses to talk to anyone, spends time in silence, and mourns the loss of the parent in consideration of his or her own mortality. And finally, the fifth and final stage is acceptance. Emotions are stable and there is calm. Family members embrace the truth of the loss and move forward bringing with them fond memories of their parent. As you go through loss, remember do not go through it alone for a long period. Seek a support group whether peer or spiritual. Choose a few who can understand the loss. Usually also those who have loss a parent.